Couples Therapy
A More Connected Love Relationship Starts Here
Many couples reach a point where the relationship no longer feels the way it once did. Communication may feel strained, the same arguments keep repeating, or emotional and sexual intimacy have faded. Some couples are navigating a painful rupture such as infidelity or the possibility of divorce. Others have a strong relationship, and want help with parenting, division of household duties, or being able to discuss important issues without fighting or sweeping it under the rug.
If you are here, your relationship matters to you. You may be tired of trying to improve things on your own or you may be worried about where your relationship is heading. I help couples slow things down, understand the patterns getting in the way, and find clarity.
What to Expect from Couples Therapy
Couples therapy works best when it is focused and collaborative. I will not judge you, decide who is right, be a referee, or let you rehash fights over and over again. I will help you understand yourselves, each other, and the relationship more clearly so you can begin responding to each other in new ways. I will also coach you in real time to make changes in how you interact.
In therapy, you will have space to:
Stop repeating the same fights and engage more productive conversations
Repair after conflict
Express what you need in ways your partner can hear
Strengthen emotional, physical, and sexual connection
Respond to one another with greater empathy and compassion
Get on the same page with parenting and family dynamics
Have a confidential place to discuss relationship and family concerns
Rebuild trust and heal relationship injuries, infidelity or betrayal, whether together or apart
I tailor therapy to your relationship and goals. Sessions are 55 minutes with longer sessions available on request. We meet in my office in Encinitas or virtually throughout California. Couples typically begin with weekly sessions.
My Approach
My work is grounded in Emotionally Focused Therapy and attachment science. I pay close attention to the patterns that take over during moments of tension, stress, and disconnection and help you understand what is happening underneath them.
Rather than focusing only on communication techniques or problem solving, I help you create greater emotional safety and security in the relationship. As your sense of connection changes, your communication will change too.
In addition, I help couples overcome challenges related to communication, conflict, sexual intimacy, parenting, family dynamics, and healing after infidelity or betrayal.
Who I Help
I welcome couples and partnerships from all cultural, relational, and family backgrounds and provide LGBTQ+ affirming care. Many of my clients are parents, business owners, leaders, and professionals in the areas of engineering, law, healthcare, and finance.
About Me
I am Cristina Trette, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in couples and relationships. My advanced training is grounded in Emotionally Focused Therapy and attachment theory, and I am committed to ongoing education, consultation, and supervision in this work. You can expect warmth, presence, directness, and engagement from me.
Frequently Asked Questions
What if my partner is hesitant to come to therapy?
It is common for one partner to feel unsure at first. Typically once they see how supportive and collaborative the process is, they want to attend. I offer complimentary consultations, for you as a couple, or for each of you individually. This helps you get a feel for my style and approach.
How long will we need couples therapy?
I generally recommend beginning with weekly sessions so we can build momentum. Some couples attend short term to address a specific concern, while others stay longer to overcome significant challenges and deepen their connection. Many couples find that I play an important role in the ongoing health and stability of their marriage and work with me over a period of many years. I will check in with you along the way to make sure the work remains aligned with your goals. You are able to end therapy at any time, for any reason.
Will you tell us who is right or wrong?
I help both partners understand their experiences, recognize the dynamic between them, take responsibility where needed, and create new ways of relating that work for both of you. If you or your spouse engage in behaviors that are harmful to the relationship, or self-destructive, I will directly name this, and guide you toward change.
Will you tell us whether we should stay together?
No. I will never make decisions about your relationship for you. When relevant, I will help you explore your options as it relates to marriage, seperation, or divorce. My role is to help you see how you show up in your relationship and create new ways of interacting. I also help you understand your values, and what you each need in order to create a healthy relationship, regardless of what decisions you make as it relates to staying together or parting ways.
Can you help if abuse is present in my relationship?
No. When psychological abuse, violence, coercive control, financial abuse, sexual harm, or other forms of abuse are present, couples therapy is not safe. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For confidential support, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or visit thehotline.org. If this describes your situation, do not schedule couples therapy, please find an individual therapist that specializes in domestic violence. You need to be connected with specialized services which I do not offer
Can you help if my partner or I are actively engaged in infidelity?
I do not provide ongoing couples therapy when either partner is actively engaged in an affair. However, I recognize that some couples seek therapy while an affair is still ongoing. In these situations, I can work with you if the involved partner is willing to end the affair and discontinue all contact with the affair partner. This creates the foundation of safety and commitment necessary to begin rebuilding trust and repairing the relationship.
Next Steps
Whether your relationship is struggling or you simply want greater depth and connection, couples therapy can help you cultivate love and wellbeing. When you are ready, reach out to get started.