Hold me Tight® Couples Workshop

A Workshop designed to help couples strengthen communication, connection, and intimacy.

Renew your relationship in two days

The start of a new relationship is typically filled with healthy communication, intimacy, and connection. Over time, many couples struggle with communication, or their spark begins to fade away.

You might find you and your partner bickering over misunderstandings or repeating the same arguments. Alternatively, you might not argue, rather you feel stuck in a state of disconnection and loneliness. Or, you might have a great relationship yet you have been so busy with careers, raising children, and the endless tasks of adulting that you may be looking for a way to reignite your passion.

We are delighted to offer an alternative or adjunct to couples therapy, The Hold Me Tight® Couples Workshop (HMT). on the evidence based model of Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, and the work of Dr. Sue Johnson, HMT incorporates education and experiential exercises that help couples build relationship skills. Participants will engage in private conversations that serve as catalysts for lasting change. By the end of the workshop, couples will have developed a deeper bond and will be equipped to work together to overcome everyday challenges, cultivating the kind of relationship they truly desire.

Upcoming Workshops

  • February 22 and 23, 2025

    9am to 5pm

    Saturday and Sunday

    $895.00 per couple

    191 Calle Magdalena
    Encinitas, CA 92024

  • March 15 and 16, 2025

    9am to 5pm

    Saturday and Sunday

    $895.00 per couple

    191 Calle Magdalena
    Encinitas, CA 92024

what you will learn

  • You will learn the art and science of attachment theory and emotional intelligence.

  • You will discover how to actively shape your relationship.

  • You will be able to identify the dance that drives fights and disconnection and learn how to shift it.

  • You will practice giving and receiving forgiveness.

  • You will connect on an emotional, mental and physical level.

  • You will develop effective communication skills.

  • You will practice asking for what you need and want in a way your partner can respond to.

  • You will explore bonding through presence to bring more fulfillment to your sexual and physical connection.

principles of the workshop

1. Most couples engage in interactional patterns that are driven by nervous system responses, emotions, perceptions, and attachment needs. We refer to this pattern as The Negative Cycle. When couples discover their negative cycle through the lens of compassion, they can work together to create a new pattern that supports communication, connection and intimacy. As a team, couples can actively shape a better love relationship.

2. When we understand that we are all seeking safety, security, love, and connection, and protect ourselves when encountering loss and rejection, it becomes easier to de-code your partner’s behaviors. Together couples can take steps toward emotional balance and closeness instead of distance and discord.

3. Couples that are skilled in emotional intelligence, and develop the ability to reach and respond to one another, can solve most problems that come their way and create the kind of relationship they truly desire.

workshop curriculum

  • The Hold me Tight program is based on the science of attachment and bonding. When partners are able to be accessible, responsive and engaged with each other this leads to improved communication, connection and intimacy. We begin our program by helping couples understand that love is logical, critical to our survival and thriving, and can be repaired, shaped and strengthened.

  • We help couples discover where they get stuck and uncover the pattern of interaction that keeps them from enjoying the love, intimacy, and connection they desire. With high amounts of compassion and acceptance we support couples to see where things go wrong in order to help them do things differently.

  • In order to strengthen the way you and your partner communicate and connect, we need to go deeper. In this portion of the workshop you and your partner will explore the triggers, emotions, perceptions and longings that drive your negative interactions. You and your partner will share honestly and vulnerably which will bring you closer and move you toward working as a team to create the kind of relationship you desire.

  • Here, you and your partner will learn how to slow down your responses and rise above the pattern. You will explore how to stop the pattern when it comes up and work together to create new ways of interaction that is built on emotional safety and security.

  • You and your partner will experience times that you get off track. You may have experiences from your past that still cause you to hurt today. In this portion of the workshop you and your partner will be guided through the process of repair, forgiveness and healing.

  • The Hold me Tight conversation promotes bonding. You and your partner will share about what you need and want in a way that you can hear and respond to.

  • Sex is an important aspect of most love relationships. In this portion of the workshop you and your partner will have a conversation about sex. You will discuss what you want to explore, what you like, what you do not like, and what you both need to create a deeply fulfilling sexual connection.

  • We complete our workshop by helping you and your partner create a plan to keep your love alive for the long haul. You can expect to experience a deep sense of connection, intimacy and closeness.

Frequently asked questions

  • We understand the need for confidentiality. Although all couples are invited to engage in discussion with the group, most conversations occur privately between partners. Couples who do not want to talk about their relationship with the group are not expected to do so, and we absolutely respect this. We want all couples to feel confident that what they share during the workshop will be kept confidential. This is important to us and we discuss this at the start of the workshop.

  • Yes! This program is designed for all couples with a desire to strengthen their relationship. We welcome couples in new relationships, those who have been married for decades or longer, and everything in between. Couples that are in newer relationships remind the group of the passion and joy that comes with early love. Couples that have been together for decades or longer share stories of commitment and resilience.

  • Yes! It is fantastic that you have a solid foundation. The concepts in this workshop will guide you to deepen your bond even more and can renew sexual excitement and spark and we offer a module that is devoted to this topic.

  • The Hold me Tight workshop provides the time and space for all couples to renew and restore their relationship. We recommend that couples who are heading toward separation or divorce to schedule an appointment with a Marriage and Family Therapist who is trained in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. If you need help finding a qualified couples therapist, contact Cristina Trette at cristina@integrativefamilytherapy.com and she can help you find someone that will be a good match for you.

  • Hold Me Tight is an educational workshop that is based on Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy. The Hold Me Tight Workshop is not marriage and family therapy, counseling, psychotherapy, or mental health counseling. This program is not suitable for couples experiencing active and untreated abuse, addiction, affairs, or severe mental illness. If you or your partner are experiencing these challenges we want to help you get the support you need. Contact Cristina Trette at cristina@integratvefamilytherapy.com and she can help you find a therapist and support.

  • Yes! We welcome all couples that are committed to their relationship in the way that they define.

  • No. We are not associated with any particular religion. We respect each individual's religion and spiritual practice. We teach tools, such as breathwork and visualization, to support participants with lowering stress and being more responsive in relationships. We also may incorporate yoga or mindfulness as they can provide a path toward emotional regulation, co-regulation and connection with self and others.

  • The Hold me Tight Couples Workshop was developed by Dr. Sue Johnson and is based on Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT) and her book, "Hold me Tight, Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love". Hold Me Tight® is a registered trademark to Sue Johnson. Emotionally Focused Therapy is based on research and has been empirically validated to improve relationship satisfaction in 70 to 90 percent of couples. The workshop is an experience that consists of relationship and attachment science education, exercises, group discussion, and conversations that take place between couples. The program is facilitated and couples are given time to work together at their own pace. The focus is on supporting couples to develop connection, intimacy, and communication. To learn more about Hold Me Tight and Emotionally Focused Therapy visit www.iceeft.org

  • In this program we cover:

    How to communicate more effectively.

    What drives distress in relationships and how to change this.

    How to build on your strengths and renew connection and bonding.

    How to stop painful patterns of fighting or lonely withdrawal.

    How to forgive and repair past difficulties in the relationship.

    How to enhance intimacy through presence and touch.

  • No! Hold me Tight is the educational form of Emotionally Focused Therapy and is not therapy.

  • Yes.

    Cristina Trette offers private intensives. To learn more about intensives click here.

    In addition we have several couples therapists at Integrative Family Therapist that are trained in the Emotionally Focused Therapy, which is the model that Hold me Tight is based on. They are available to see you on a weekly basis at our office in Encinitas, CA or via video if you are located elsewhere in California. If you do not live in California we recommend you utilize the International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy directory by clicking here.

About your Facilitator

Cristina Trette, LMFT, brings a decade of expertise in helping couples strengthen communication, connection, and intimacy. As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and founder of Integrative Couples Therapy, Cristina specializes in guiding couples toward deeper understanding and lasting emotional bonds. Her workshops provide a warm, supportive environment where couples learn effective tools to transform patterns, improve communication, and foster trust. Through her guidance, couples gain insights and skills that bring renewed closeness and resilience to their relationships.

Who should attend

The Hold me Tight® Couples Workshop is designed for all couples in committed relationships. It is particularly helpful for couples wanting to explore their relationship and create better communication and stronger intimacy. Couples in newer relationships will set their relationship up for success. Seasoned couples will have the opportunity to develop new tools, renew their bond, and bring healing to distressed aspects of their relationship.

This workshop is not intended for couples that are experiencing active infidelity, addiction, abuse, high conflict, or taking steps toward divorce. If you are in this situation we recommend that you begin therapy. You can contact our office for more information on our therapy services.